Generation Dead
by Killer.love.1991
Summary: ** I do not own the walking dead** It's a world she's grown to know, that didn't care about her and would throw her into a cold storm of emotions and pain like she had never known, she doesn't want to live in it anymore. It was a cruel fate for everyone, so unforgiving. Eventual Daryl/OC, but doesn't always focus on the romance! Family, angst, and friendship included.
1. Prolouge

Prolouge

Mariah

Name: Mariah Evans  
Age: 22  
Nicknames: Mya

Physical Description:

-Light Brown hair  
-Grey eyes  
-5'4" and slim  
-Curvaceous  
-Uneven lips, bottom fuller than the top  
-heart shaped face  
-Pointed chin  
-High cheek bones  
-Dimples  
-Pale almost translucent skin

Have you ever listened to your own heart beat? Can you find trust in that one steady pulse, letting you know you are alive? Have to been so close to losing that one thing that you are sure about, that you can count on, that you suddenly realized the purpose behind your hearts steady rhythm?

Truly your heart is the most truth in your whole existence. It leads you towards your wants, and needs. It realizes lies and distinguishes the truth and honest in one person. Your heart is the key to finding the fighter in you.

Your heart enables you to feel, to remember a lost love, or an occasion long since forgotten. It aches towards what it hasn't yet regarded with its intelligence and faith in the future. It flutters in the presence of love and locks itself down in the dwelling threats of mistrust that would wound it in the slightest.

Our hearts are the most vulnerable, yet the strongest granted it knows its weakness and fights alongside it.

I fight with my heart. I dance to its drumming rhythm.

In the unknown that this world bestows upon me, it is my heart that leads me


	2. Chapter 1

Authors Note: Hey there! I'm back with a fanfic for my favorite T.V. series as of right now, the walking dead. I have lots of ideas and I hope I don't disappoint, there's a great deal of pressure on me for this one, by myself and for you guys. Enjoy!

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Chapter 1- Falling apart.

*flashback*

The world was going to shit. There wasn't much to say about the matter.

When word first circulated of the sickness, it wasn't major news. When they found no cure and they failed to cover a major attack where a man ate another mans face, people finally managed to open their eyes. It was finally addressed as an epidemic.

The infected were loosely labeled 'sick'.

As soon as my parents had found out about it, they'd called me, and I rushed there to keep close to them for safety when we thought that would work. Both of my parents were doctors and were in on the secret long before many other people had a chance. We stood a fighting chance, but they both knew.

They knew even if we escaped, we would need a cure if any of us were to survive. I loved my Father, and trusted him completely. My Mother supported him too. What I didn't understand was why they wanted to act as if everything was normal while everything fell apart.

That's how I found myself here now; in a high school. Only very few were here. People around here were here solely to stay close to people they cared about, or from families who didn't understand what was happening. It was hard to believe but not everyone had someone working so close to the sickness that they knew the harshness of the problem.

I carried a grey flower design school bad, trying to keep the tears out of my eyes. My Mom was sick. Worse, running a horrible fever. Today she had coughed up blood. My Dad told me exactly what was going on, what would happen, and what I had to do.

My Mom made the effort to get up and make a small bundle of the remaining food she could salvage that was non-perishable in our kitchen. She kissed my forehead and embraced me tightly in her fevered arms.

She left me a letter, from her and my Daddy that I kept in my buttoned coat pocket in case I had to lose my backpack

My Daddy hugged me and for the first time in my lifetime I saw him shed tears of guilt, grief and hopelessness. He took the time to put my hair up in a red satin bow. He asked me if I had packed sturdy clothes, all the important things. He told me possessions would grow to mean nothing in time he was grateful I would still have before me. He has complete faith in me.

We packed the food, clothes, and an extra gift in it for me. He handed me his old song book; that was filled with a collection of songs he'd created and could be played on guitar. He handed me a picture of us all to keep safe, and a little black blank journal.

"Remember who you are." They warned.

Now I sniffled and bit back a sob as I opened the door to the gymnasium and ducked under the beams of the bleachers. Being back in high school seemed almost fitting, I felt so weak and small compared that I felt like a little girl again.

Without hesitation I walked into the storage closet and glanced around. I knew what I was here for, a selection was placed before me but I was keen on my weapon of choice. Other than the small shotgun and pocket knife I had attached to the gun belt around my waist, I had two main ideas.

The one course I got nearly perfect in was now a plus for me now. Archery. I took the strongest bow, inspecting it quietly for a moment. Sure, there were adjustments I would make, but now it was alright for use.

Silently I was thanking whoever was looking down on me that my school was cheap. They had bought real bows and dulled them up for use. With a little sharpening these would be perfect for use.

I let the arrows clatter to the bottom of my bag, closing the zipper on either side just before the feathered ends of each one so the backpack worked as an arrow casing. Pleased with my work I turned and got the final weapon: the metal bar used to reach up and lift or lower the basketball nets all around the gym. It was light and easily accessible, and brutally solid. It was perfect. I made a quick decision and put the bow in the backpack too and hoisted it over my back

After I was armed, I walked out and sat on the front steps of my school. I looked around at all the things I knew and loved one last time, unsure of how this would all end. No one knew what to do anymore, everything was dying away. I didn't know how to do this. I was still young. And most importantly, still human. I just had to survive. But I knew I couldn't do it all alone.

My Mom had probably already turned. My Dad would've dealt with her and then himself, not willing to live in a world where she didn't exist. He'd told me before he left that that was what would happen. The show before I left was all in hopes of me leaving with one last, good memory.

Leaving was surely something I would never forget.

To my surprise, as I sat there I was granted one more miracle as my best friend and sister Melissa rushed towards me, almost unrecognizable with how fast she was moving.

It took her a little time to race up the stairs and plow into me, catching me in a hug. We fell back, holding each other tightly, crying silently. Only mostly, however, because she was sobbing into my shoulder.

Melissa Raussi had been my friend since before I could remember. She was beautiful in an exotic way, with long glossy black hair and wide hazel eyes. Her skin was tan and flawless, her body tall and slim. Everybody wanted to be her friend and share her glory.

Sadly, in a world was going to hell like this, her looks would only get her so much. Trouble was guaranteed.

I wasn't too concerned for myself, I wasn't much. I wasn't ugly, by any means, but I was only pretty. I had long mid-chest length light brown hair. My skin was fair and I had many scars and marks across me. I had many freckles and dark eyelashes framing grey eyes. But I was just a girl, not someone one might compare them to.

Mel pulled away and looked me over. "I thought I'd never see you again." She squeaked.

I sniffled. "I'm leaving. Mom and Dad are gone."

"No!" She gasped, eyes filling with fresh tears. Being so close, our families were pretty much one in the same. Our families were undistinguished, we were all together. Or we once had been.

I nodded, biting my lip. "Come with me! I just grabbed some weapons from the gym. We need to get out of here."

"I can't." She whispered. "I can't run."

"Why not?!" I cried, standing up. She followed lead and answered with one action.

Very deliberately, she placed a hand protectively over her stomach that was holding out the fabric of her baggy sweater. In my relief to see her in my haste at getting as close to her as possible, I hadn't even noticed.

She swallowed, looking at the ground. "My parents were one of the first to turn. There's no hope, is there?" She asked rhetorically.

"It's Trey's?" I referred to her boyfriend of nearly three years.

"Yes... I don't know what's happened to him; I've searched and found no sign of him."

I sighed. "I can't leave you here. I haven't seen you in moths. How far along are you?"

"Eight months." She answered automatically.

I was surprised. "You were hiding it before."

She nodded.

I tried thinking quickly. "You're no use to run away from these things. You'll need somewhere to stay and someone to help you. Bridget. She's a nurse; she owns the convenience store by my house. She's in hiding lock down at the store; she's got food, a safe place to sleep. Go there. She'll let you in if you say I sent you."

"But I don't want to leave you behind." She sobbed.

"You have no choice." I shrugged solemnly, trying to keep her calm. At this stage stress was terrible. "This is for Trey, and for your baby. I'll get out of town- just for a little while." I assured her when I saw her panic. "-And then return when it's safe. I promise."

She looked at me longingly but nodded in her understanding and I turned around, picking up my backpack and the metal bar off the stairs where it had fallen.

"I'll miss you." Mel blubbered and touched her matching cross necklace we had gotten one Christmas we spent together as a converged family. Now most of that family was lost but our bond still remained.

I touched mine in return. "I love you, Mel. I won't forget."

She nodded and walked off a shaking and sobbing mess. I wasn't much better. I had just said goodbye to everything I held near and dear.

My world was gone. Now I just had to survive the rest of this damned world going to shit, all because the dead learned how to walk.

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Leave me a little comment, tell me what you think! I'd love to know in what direction you think this story should go. R&R 3


	3. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: HA I TOTALLY OWN THE WALKING DEAD AND SHANE IS STILL ALIVE APRIL FOOLS :D *ahem* I wish. I really do, but I own nothing ._.

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Chapter 2~

*continued flashback*

But it was never safe.

I found my way through the city and to the highway finding it jam-packed and frenzied. People were abandoning their cars in hope of escape. One glance was enough to let me know I didn't have driving as an option.

Grumbling to myself I moved back through the flock of people. It terrified me when the loud clipping of helicopter wings were heard close overhead. I looked up, my hair whipping around me, and it sped down towards the city. There was a whistle sound and fire rose from the top of my city's skyscrapers.

I gaped like a fish as I watched and quickly turned to compose myself. With a long weary sigh, my racing mind shifted to other exits. This was Georgia, I knew my way through the woods like second nature.

A horse! I needed a horse. I rode a little when I was younger but I knew now it was my one choice. I took up a steady pace, jogging through the woods and across pavement in a direction I knew well. Melissa used to rise horses.

Just her name brought tears to my eyes as I examined the smoke cloud fading in the distance. I shook my head to clear it. I couldn't afford to waste any time on things I couldn't change.

I all but threw the barn doors open once I got to it, heaving breaths through my burning lungs. I'd gotten too far, it can't all go to waste now.

My eyes weren't capable of forming any more tears. In my haste, I completely forget to be careful and survey the area.

I slid down the nearest wall, coughing and took one deep, calming breath. But the rank stench in the air made me choke and sputter, covering my nose with my sleeve. The wake up call had me looking around and I noticed an open take box and stall.

"Hello?Hello?!" I called out. "Are you ok-"

A... thing jumped out at me. It wasn't human, but it resembled one. Its flesh was gray and dead, cold to the touch while it tackled me to the floor. Its teeth were yellow and some were missing. I couldn't tell what color its eyes might have been. There were now clouded milky white. It snapped at my face and I grunted and yelled in fear. My hand reached for anything that could be used as a weapon and when I felt metal I connected the object with the skull of the monster above me. It collapsed on me and I gasped at the weight of it.

Quickly I rolled it from me and started at it wide-eyed, recognizing the face. "Oh no, Stacey." I choked out.

Without another word I glanced into the stall. My stomach lurched and I puked over the bucket of water next to me. She'd been feeding on her horse, Richie. His innards were...well...outward. I couldn't take much more of this.

Startled I gazed at the closed-door that was the stall to my horse, at least the on who was loyal and loving to me. "C'mon I need you now. Please be okay." I asked fervently.

"Cruise? Cruise, baby?" I cooed and a great grey head bobbed up from sniffling under the stall door. Uneasy whines escaped him but he poked out his nose for me to rub, asking me to let him out. He neighed and I hushed him, opening the door and rubbing his neck. He snorted and swished his tail.

I slipped the saddle into place on the green saddle pad, trying to camouflage him. I slung on the bridle and lead him outside with him nickering anxiously. As I mounted him he jostled and my flickering eyes trying to readjust caught sight of a yellow sign on the door.

I whacked him for moving but quickly forgave him. I was jumpy also. He had good reason.

"Thanks babe." I whispered in his ear and then pushed him forward, having found a direction to head to finally.

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R&R is greatly appreciated :3


	4. Chapter 3

Authors Note: Alright, well hey guys! So this is the first chapter in the present perspective of Mariah. I'm already working on the next chapter, just so you know. And as always, please review and let me know what you think! It keeps us writers going, you know! 3

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Chapter 3~

I glared down at the society below me, mindless zombies.

While they waddled past, I muttered, "That's right. Keep walking."

I looked up towards the grey skies. 'Where are the angels?' I pondered. They were supposed to be prophesied to reign down and collect the humanity at its brink. If this wasn't the end, this not the brink, I feared what it truly would be.

Or… What if the end had come and gone? What if I were judged and left here in this hell while the population that seemed to have disappeared mysteriously were now watching from heaven? What sins had I not repented for?

I liked to believe there were angels. There had to be a supernatural being amplifying my mortal strength for me to have come this far and survived this long.

But if that were the case, then the cold truth that whatever greater being was up there had no compassion for me, and didn't except me for who I am and what I've done, and I was an outcast among the seven billion of us there had once been.

What would that make me? A demon child?

I gritted my teeth. Maybe there was something more, maybe I was assigned to a greater task and purpose I just had yet to find the reason. With a deep breath, I stepped off and plunged three floors off the building I was standing on only to grab on to the window sill of one of the apartments and swing in through a crack of an open window.

The white curtains billowed around me as my eyes adjusted to the room around me. My eyes surveyed the room; once, twice. 'Great, nobody's home', I thought.

Stealthily, I collected a small dinner, just small enough for me to gain strength but so little that this family or person wouldn't be too robbed of their own inventory. I grabbed some salt crackers, a loaf of bread, and some meat stew. I snatched a bowl and threw it in my backpack, tossing it over my shoulder. I proceeded to tuck my hair into the hoodie I was wearing and pull up the hood, slipping on some gloves so my fingerprints weren't distinguishable to an untrained eye.

To my luck, as I searched the rest of the house quickly, I hit the jackpot rummaging through a drawer by the bedside, where a small shot-gun and some ammo were stashed. I took it all, stuffing everything together and headed to get out. I made it to the window I'd welcomed myself in through, when I heard the sound that I hated the most: The sound of a key grinding into a lock, and a key chain clattering.

It had happened many times before and since I had collected all my bearings earlier, I determined my best bet would be to hide within the apartment.

The door swung open, creaking on its hinges. Something dropped to the floor by the closet door, otherwise known as the place I was hiding. Unaware of me, a young brunette slid through the door.

I observed her, and noticed the same things I noticed with the street-walker in the dim grey light most days. She was alive, however, and they were not. She was playing dead, and now she rushed through the house, trying to collect what she could to run. Though I wasn't her greatest worry I stayed out of sight to keep out of trouble.

Not even breathing I slipped out the first chance I got and ghosted down the hall. Checking my back I slipped out the tenth floor window and snuck to the top of the building climbing with much agility.

I looked off the edge of the balcony once more.

I was strong, remaining, but alone. I couldn't deny the loneliness inside. I hadn't communicated with another human since the end of the world even started. But I found security in my reasoning. It was alright, because it was better not to trust.

But when I did gaze up calmly, it was the same useless 'what if's' wandering through my mind. And I hated it.

I hated feeling like this, this helplessness. I hated the feeling of being unwanted, and forgotten. I hated the loving all my family and friends throughout it all, even though they were gone. I hate being an invisible blotch on the world's radar. Some days I just wish I could exist.

I was crossing through this city; I had left Cruise in the woods a little ways from here so I could raid myself a few more supplies for survival. Getting out of here wasn't a problem, even if I caused uproar and needed to use my small pistol I had just gathered, I'd make it out. It was a mindless thing by this point; I knew I would survive if I did the same techniques.

I jumped down from a low balcony as I reached very close to the crease between the city and the forest. A few geeks looked my way and groaned greedily but I just ran by and swung the metal rod I carried in my head and smashed its skull in, downing it and watching the blood drip out from its nose.

I ran and caught one heading for Crusader but he kicked at him and he broke a leg and fell backwards.

"Atta boy." I said, mounting him expertly and untying him from the tree as we breezed out of there just in time for the last bit of sun to guide us safely into the dense woods that had us fairly hidden.

Through my travels I'd thought of where I was headed, even grabbed a map. In the end I decided if there was anywhere to head to, it was to Georgia's capital, Atlanta.

I was on my way there when my course changed and I saw my first ray of light in the darkness around me. Of course it was clouded by fear and anxiety, but it gave me a fighting chance to get where I was now.

I had mentioned my parents were doctors. They were, but more importantly they were scientists for the CDC, which they'd fled when they had the chance. I didn't realize that to get my to fort Benning I would have to pass here, but it was by pure luck when I thought about it. A cure was what we all had searched for, and if anyone was closest to being safe and finding a chance it would be whoever was in the institute.

It was an open place, only protected on the outside by a tall metal fence that I could climb over and hop down from within a minute.

There was one problem, however. I had Cruise with me, and he would need a place to stay. No way in hell was I losing him. I hopped off him and grabbed his reigns, pulling him out around the center, looking for the main gate. There were small portables around the grounds of the center that included class room like facilities and some were garages, and there was one just a few feet from the side of the CDC that had two doors side by side that I could fit Cruise in.

I did and heard a voice start talking over the intercom, shocking me but sparking hope. There was someone here. "What are you doing? These are my grounds. Go along on your way stranger."

I rolled my eyes. Yeah, walkers were gonna listen to that.

I dropped the bag of oats into a bucket and a bunch of apples and carrots hidden underneath. He'd be fine for a while.

"Okay, Crusader, I'll be back for you, okay? Hush and stay strong. I'll bring back all I can." I whispered to him, smoothing down his forelock and stroking his nose. Then I pushed the doors closed, hearing him snort at the darkness for a moment so I cut a few holes into the wood door frame before I tied it tightly with a rope. No one was going to get to my baby.

But when I turned around I found out that I might want to be a little more concerned for myself as walkers circled around on me from around the building. I bit my lip, swinging my backpack over both shoulders and holding the metal rod up, doing all that I needed to. I ran forward, swinging the rod at the heads of walkers that gurgled and snarled when they came too close to me. Mid swing I caught two in one shot and pulled the walker into my path. I jumped over it quickly, bolting and searching the building for doors.

Luck was not on my side for the side of the building I happened to be running along, I turned the corner and grabbed a metal railing, hauling my swinging self up onto a high ledge.

The walkers didn't pause in their determination for their next meal, but were deterred when a door closed quickly from overhead, locking them out of the platform. Swiveling around I lowered the rod and looked around in the dark shadows of the room I was in.

A blond man stepped into my view, shielding one of the hallways that this room was attached to, wielding a shotgun that was pointed at me.

"What the hell do you want here?! Why couldn't you leave it alone?!" He asked, moving forward and waving the shotgun.

"My parents used to work here." I answered, raising my hands slowly in the air. "They left when they could to come save my sorry ass. Now I'm here to repay the favor. I want to help with the cure."

He glared at me. "You came two weeks too late, darling. There's not much anyone can do anymore."

"Just give me a chance!" I cried. "There's still a fighting chance!"

"In a world like this?!" He yelled at me and I set my jaw and stared back at his furious gaze evenly.

He let out an irritated sigh and hesitated to lower the gun, but did so. "It's mandatory you go through a blood test. All your outside world connections must disappear. Your only inspirations and missions are towards this cause, understood?!" He barked.

"Understood." I allowed, dropping my hands slowly.

He snorted and turned. "No you don't. You haven't been here that long. Forget it, follow me." He allowed and walked back down the hall, and towards a metal door that I recognized. It was an elevator that seemed to only go down. I bit my cheek.

He pressed the button and turned to look back at me. "The lab is underground. Safer, enclosed, no way in or out if Vi says otherwise."

"Vi?" I asked.

"The computer monitoring all systems in the CDC. It has a mind of it's own, it was essential back when people had begun to lose their minds that this be a safe place when push comes to shove and humans aren't fit for that. So Vi was invented."

The ding of the elevator hitting our floor and opening smoothly interrupted his speech and he walked in, naturally expecting me to follow. The metal doors closed behind us and my stomach flipped as he lurched to a downwards motion, heading underground.

"We're headed for the facilities main floors. There are game rooms, bathrooms and bedrooms as well as labs, because most of the scientists, probably including your parents stayed for weeks and months on end, never-ceasing work, never going without what they needed."

I nodded and the door opened signaling the beginning of my tour of the CDC that served as the home my parents were condemned to for the last two months they'd been alive. Chagrin swept through me at the thought and I bristled at every place we went, knowing it held some sort of bittersweet memories.

"You can take any room you'd like. You know where the bathrooms and the game room are. I'll take you to the lab when you are all settled-"

A sharp buzz like the bell on a washing machine rang out sharply, making the man and me jump. "Why can't people leave me the FUCK ALONE today?" He yelled as he walked out and headed for the elevator.

I turned, threw my backpack onto the double bed and jogged behind him to follow him up to see who the other survivors were. It made me excited in a pleasant way to know I wasn't really all alone like I once thought I was after being solo for a little while.

The elevator door opened and he lifted his shotgun, stalking forward. I waited timidly for a moment as he made his presence known and spoke.

"What do you want?" He asked lowly, clearly tiring of all his anger after his outburst at me.

"A chance." A voice answered, an answer most inspirational and strong, yet so true. It was similar to my own words, and I noticed the doctor's eyes flash to look back at me and I stepped forward, standing beside him but still several feet away.

I looked down at not just a few survivors, but a group.

The leader was a man with almost windswept brown hair and brown eyes. He wore a sheriffs hat and a badge was on his brown button up shirt, pulled up to his elbows. It was obvious he had once been a sheriff for some small town, but had all the correct qualities for the job.

There was a woman with long dark hair next to him, protecting a little boy with all the strength her weak body had to manage. She had wide brown eyes and was rather skinny, even given the circumstances on food nowadays.

I was willing to bet the little boy was the sheriffs son, he had a striking resemblance to the man who was clearly the leader, but it appeared he had his mothers dark hair. He clearly didn't want to be hidden from the action behind his mother.

On the other side of the leader was a man with dark hair that looked to belong in the military. He wore a wife beater and camouflage pants with combat boots. He was rather intimidating, and was obviously 's right hand man.

Behind him were four other people; A mother with pixie like features and short graying hair that was protecting her little blond daughter, and a tall man and slender woman who looked to be a couple, who were both dark. The little blond girl seemed content to be hidden from everyone's view, unlike the boy.

Standing just behind Lori was a man, who looked to be of Asian decent, with eyes closer to an almond shape of brown and dark hair.

There was a blond who looked beaten and broken, more so than all the other people in the group. She had an air of defeat around her that made me frown at her. She was about the same age as the leader.

Rather close to her was an older man with white hair and a funny hat that I knew would be how I would define him from the others. He wore beige suspenders and a white t-shirt.

The last man was obviously from the back woods. He had dark sandy blond hair, and a dark tan. He wore a flannel shirt with the sleeves cut off and jeans with work boots, over his shoulder he had a weapon I didn't see a lot of people defend themselves with; a crossbow. I cocked my head a little at this realization and he steadied a hard gaze on me with some of the nicest blue eyes I'd ever seen.

I looked away quickly. I had never expected there to be a lot of them, no more but a handful, but actually there was thirteen. Wow.

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Alrighty, there you go! There's a little sneak peak into what is going on in Mariah's head just as she's introduced into the Atlanta Survivor's family! Like it? Love it? Hate it? LET ME KNOW! Until next time~


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

My eyes widened a little while I looked them over, holding my rod up loosely.

The doctor side glanced at my evaluation after asking me what they wanted.

"A chance." The leader said, with all the inspirationaly, heart wrenching power he could in the two words. It was a play at the doctors will and it was a far better answer than mine had been.

"That's an awful lot to ask for in a world like this." He said truthfully.

"You granted me one." I reasoned for them in adding this, softly, looking up at him. And I really had to look up, I was very small in some cases. I was only five foot four.

He looked down at me uneasily and the same man spoke again, saying, "Look, we all want the same thing. Just food, a place to stay. You know what the monsters are like that are out there. And we have kids." He motioned to the little girl and boy behind their respective mothers.

I looked back at the doctor after he turned and walked down the same hall he'd shown me through. The people looked back to me. He didn't seem like the type to grant access so he did so in a begrudging manner, expecting people to take a hint. I looked at them and blushed scarlet under all the eyes on me and shrugged, giving a tiny smile and murmuring, "It's safe."

The sherriff nodded aand waved everyone forward.

"What's your name?" He asked me.

"I'm Mariah." I whispered. I smiled in greeting and held out a hand.

"Rick Grimes." He greeted as I shook his hand. "That's my wife, Lori and my son Carl." He waved towards the dark haired girl and her son. Ha, I knew it!

"That's Shane." he pointed to the man dressed like he was in the army. "And Andrea." He motioned to the older blond.

"That's Jacqui and T-Dog." He motioned tot he dark man and woman who were close to each other.

"And Carol, Sophia, and Glenn." Were the mother daughter pair and the asian man.

"And that's Morales and Daryl." He pointed to a bigger gentleman and the rugged looking man with the crossbow.

I nodded in understanding and we all followed the doctor into the elevator to go to the basement. He pressed the button and the little boy flinched. "Are we going to the basement?"

I looked over and smiled reassuringly. "It don't feel like it, bud. No worries."

His mother-Lori, I think her name was- nodded at me in greeting and thanks as her son's fear weakened.

All of us in the elevator was a packed place. The doctor ended up grabbing my wrist and pulled me towards him, making me jump and flinch at his sudden contact. But he released me just as quickly as he had grabbed me, putting me effectively between him and the rest of the group. I was now standing right in front of Daryl and Shane. I looked up backwards at Shane and he rolled his eyes at the doctor and smiled warmly at me, making me grin a little in return. I glanced at Daryl, who raised an eyebrow at the doctor and smirked a bit.

The elevators ding had us all but tumbling out of the small crammed space. Some people laughed but one looked like he felt the need to be quarantined after being in such close proximity to the people. Daryl obviously wasn't used to being close to any people. Was he a newcomer too?

"Welcome to the headquarters of the scientists and doctors of the CDC who used to be here." He spread his arms up above him, then dropped them as he turned. "My name is Jenner."

The little girl waved at him with a shy smile and he waved back. It was incredibly cute.

"The facility includes a gane room that branches off into many different bedrooms that I'm positive you will all fit in." There were relieved sighs all around. "And bathrooms in each. Showers were seperate and I will lead you to them if necessary."

I was suddenly aware of being watched and glanced up, surprised to see many curious eyes on me as I bit my lip. I removed my teeth from my lower lip and blushed at the ground.

"First off, though, how about we have something to eat! It's been quite a while since I've had visiters."

At this announcement my mouth began to water and I swallowed quietly. It had been forever since I'd eaten real food."

"I'll introduce you to your rooms."

"I've already got mine." I informed, pointing to my open door at the end of the hall. "So back off." I said, seeing the little boy smirk and the little girl look at me. I raised my hands like claws and growled playfully at her. She copied my pose and roared, giggling at me. Carol laughed at the pair of us and winked when I looked up at her. I smiled back.

"Very well. Go get ready and meet us in the dining room. As for the rest of you, follow me." He instructed and they walked ahead. Sophia looked back at me and waved, Carl smiled and nodded at me, and most of the adult looked back at me in curiousity. It became apparant to me that they might think I was a doctor, as I'd been here with Dr. Jenner on their arrival. I'd clear it up later.

There wasn't much to see in the room, a few pictures on the wall of some of the old residents of the CDC. There was a pair of dog tags on the back of the door that were empty and I pocketed them with curiousity, wanting to see if I could get my inscription on it.

I kept most of my things safely in the backpack but took out a fresh change of clothes and my new journal. In the safety of the CDC I could write my first entry tonight.

There was a small mirror and I looked into it intently, giggling at my appearance. I looked terrible, hair knotted and twisted in tangles. I grabbed a brush and worked through it until it settled nicely over my one shoulder. The rest of the dirt and scratches would have to wait for when I got to the showers. I didn't even change my clothes, I just pulled up the sleeves of my sweater.

I wandered out of the room and almost into the army guy, Shane, who's room was apparantly next to mine.

"Woah there." He said as he caught me by the shoulders. "I don't even know your name and you're falling for me." He joked.

I laughed at my own clutziness and stood up, fixing my shirt. "I'm Mariah Evans." I introduced with a bow. "Did you like my intro?"

"It was definetly one of a kind." He winked, making me giggle. "I'm Shane Walsh."

"Nice to meet you." I shook his hand. "Now its time I introduce everyone to my perfect gracefulness. Rival's a ballerina's, y'know?"

Shane laughed and we walked together to the dining room.

"Hi Mya!" Sophia called excitedly, waving. I waved and grabbed a plate, sitting away from the table on a crate in the corner. I blushed but everyone seemed to understand and didn't say a word.

Shane and I had been the last to get there. When we settled dinner was finally served. It was a chicken roast, mashed potatoes, carrots and gravy drizzled over it all. In excitement most table manners were thrown out the window, but I kept mine intact, eating quietly but quickly, unable to contain myself.

Everyone finished eating at about the same time. Even the kids, who were too hungry to be picky. Around that time, wine and other alcoholic beverages were revealed and distributed. That was around the time my memories got a little less sharp.

I was a whiskey girl through and through. When that Jack Daniel's bottle caught my eye, I walked over wihtout a thought, leaning over a man I hadn't noticed before. "Aha, so she arrives!" He yelled, catching many people's attention as my fingers rested on the bottle.

I smirked. "Whiskey makes me happy, okay?"

He laughed and shrugged. "I'm Glenn." He reached back to shake my hand.

"Mariah." I took his hand and shook it, while I grabbed the bottle and returned to my place.

I took a swig, appreciating the burn in my throat and warmth in my chest. I took another modest sip that spread the comforting warmth to my fingers and toes, I pulled the sleeves of my sweater down and grabbed the loose ends of it, closing my eyes as I felt the warmth of my sweater and the whiskey.

When I opened my eyes I glanced upwards and saw the huntsman, the only other person besides me who sat away from the group at the table, watching my restless movement. He looked back at me evenly and the ghost of a smirk drew my attention to his lips and the slight crinkling around his piercing blue gaze. It was a look that said he understood how I felt. I nodded at him with a grin and he nodded back.

Lori, who only grank a little wine, gathered up young Carl and fetched Rick to kiss him goodnight and head off to bed. I envied her, being able to be surrounded by family as she slept.

Carol and Sophia exited also, smiling at me happily and bidding me sweet dreams.

Glenn was, for lack of a better word, shit faced. He was giggling like a school boy, running around and causing trouble. At one point he skidded over to me and grabbed my kneecap, leaning in.

"Hello pretty lady. W-wanna d-dance?" He stuttered, blushing pink and looking down. I cupped his face in my hands and kissed his nose. "Aw, why don't you go find someone to dance to and I'll actually get music playing?" I suggested, treating him as if he were as old as the children who once were here. He nodded amd stumbled off. I grinned and watched him before disappearing out of the room and going to my bedroom, finding my Ipod. I'd left it in a front pocket, not even realizing. It had been shut down so it still had half battery, and I was grateful.

I returned and quietly looked over most of the software that was in the computer system, and I was relieved to find there was a simple USB port for me to hook it into. I wasn't too applied when it came to electronics and I wasn't one to ask for help.

I skimmed through my music, testing to volume. "Hey Glenn? Any song requests?"

He ran over happily, almost tripping on a chair leg and flying forward three extra feet. He grabbed the Ipod and looked through it, awestruck.

"I love you, man." He said to me, throwing an arm over my shoulder. He selected a song and it blared through the speakers. I gave a little dance at the beginning and Glenn laughed at my attempt. It was only a few seconds later when the kids ran in, hyped up and ready to go. I threw back my head and laughed. All the adults looked at me, some shaking their head in amazement, others smiling and raising an eyebrow.

Sophia ran at me and I bent down. She took the opportunity to run and throw her arms around my neck. I grinned and picked her up as the chorus came up and took her little hand, extending our arm as we danced.

"Hey soul sister, ain't that Mr. Mister on the radio, stereo? The way you move ain't fair y'know!" Her and I sang together, dancing around in a little circle, swaying. She giggled and hugged me when the song came to the closing. I was breathing hard, but happily when the next song came on.

I set her down when I noticed Carl eye her curiously. She raced over to him and they danced together in a circle, Carl trying to show off his moves. I grinned at Glenn.

"Still looking for that dance?" I asked him. The kids obviously wouldn't know what the song meant, thankfully, but he seemed to know the song quite well. He chuckled.

"You can't dance for your life!"

"Not true! It just depends what kind of dancing." I informed him with a wink.

He shrugged and danced wildly, drunkenly and I laughed, whipping my hair to the other side and moving my body in the pattern of the drum line, raising my hands into my hair and working a figure eight with my hips, working my way upwards and downwards until my whole body was in movement with the song, freezing and slowing down when the music did. I knew how this affected most people, I went to a club more than once and knew how to get a reaction. I smiled and bit my lip as the song finished. "It's going down in my heaad..."

Glenn whistled and clapped, and I laughed.

"Oohhhh!" He gasped when the next song came on. "I WILL POWN YOU LITTLE GIRL."

I smirked and nodded. "You're on."

"Jumpstyle."

I shrugged. "Hardstyle it is."

The music roared up. I'd learnt this one summer when I was at my trailer, and I'd never forgotten it. Glenn started and I had to admit he was good, and then the beat slowed and it was my cue when the singer complained of the slow music. I gave a wicked smile and I heard the group clap for Glenn, and then I started. It was a simple dance if you kept the beat and knew what moves to join together, and I flew into motion, my hair falling down my back and moving with my ever move.

I stopped and bowed all in one motion and Glenn looked bewildered to know I really could dance, and tried hardstyle himself. When he couldn't get it we timed it together, and I taught him over the music. By the end we stopped and rewound our bodies, doing a perfect pair hardstyle. When he finally got it he turned to me and engulfed me in a hug that I wasn't expecting. I froze for a second and he pulled back before I could react. He walked over to the group as I noticed the others were laughing and dancing with the kids, or by themselves and making fools of themselves for the enjoyment of the others. I gave a satisfied sigh and stepped away from the action, waiting until I was tired enough to go to sleep.

The next song I drummed on the counter with the drum line and sang with the music, staring at the wall. I remembered doing grade 11 talent show with Melissa, singing this song.

"It burns a little oil grindin' into gear  
Super glue holding up the rear view mirror  
But woah oh oh, it has a real good radio  
Every now and then you'll hear a funny sound  
And the windows won't roll all the way down  
But woah oh oh, it has a real good radio

I remember the first time  
Headin' out to a bonfire  
Turned it up as loud as it would go  
Oh or the time that Amy and I  
Drove towards that big Alberta sky  
I can't believe the speakers didn't blow  
Singing every single song at the top of our lungs!"

Absently I began playing with my cross and when I noticed I remembered Mel with a sad twist in my stomach. I caught sight of the eye of another set of sad eyes, the older blond from earlier, Andrea. I smiled sadly at her, and she tried to smile back, I could tell. I left her alone, standing and turning to leave the room.

And it made me feel a sense of belonging when Glenn came out to say goodnight to me, and Andrea waved. When I looked over at to the rest of the group they were all busy and I did meet Daryl's eyes and Shane's eyes. They both ducked their head with a soon as my head hit the pillow in my bedroom I was out like a light and didn't move the rest of the night.

* * *

Author's Note: Alright so, I love music. I HAVE MENTIONED THAT. LOL. Sooo the songs used in this fanfic are not owned by me, "Jumpstyle Music" "Real Good Radio" "In my head" and "Hey soul sister" Belong to their respective owners!

As usual I would love R&R , just to get an idea of where you think I should go with this and what you would like to see more of, less of, and just your opinion overall.

Give love for Daryl and Glenn in the next episode this sunday 3

And Shane, I shall always miss you. If only you didn't have to go...


	6. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Shooting up in a blind fight or flight mode, I grasped the thick blankets in white knuckle fists and gasped back the scream of terror threatening to break through. I released the blanket slowly once I knew where I was, my fingers slowly letting the fabric slip free and fall to heaps at my sides. My heart beat was frenzied, petrified in a casing of stone.

I didn't realize I was crying until a wetness hit my leg and made me jump again. Wiping it away with the back of my hand, I finally breathed slow and blindly reached to my side to lessen the darkness, if only in the room.

There was a click and my eyes squinted away from the lamp in pain. My hand dropped to rest on the velvety black cover of the notebook I accidentally left out yesterday.

"'S as good a time as any." I mumbled in a sleepy slur, aware now of the aching behind my eyes was a whiskey-induced headache from last night.

In a neat, italic hand, I began to address the one person on my mind and the admitable fear in my nightmare:

_Dear Mel,_

_It's been a while, hasn't it, hun? I dreamt of you last night. I dreamt you walked into my room, your hair covering your face as you stared at the wall. I was crest-fallen. It pains me to see you upset. It always has._

_We were where I am now; The CDC. You told me those people I met were traitors, just a band of people who would get me killed. Were you protecting me, sister? I wonder now if you were right._

_But I can't deny the safety I feel, walking around amongst my kind, not the groaning, walking dead. If anything, I believe I should stay for safety in numbers. I can't be willing to become close to them, however, you were right about that. If numbers prove to be a problem, I predict it to be that we will lose a lot of people. It's part of the reason I think I'll still prefer traveling with just crusader._

_I just want to see your face. Have you hold me, look me in the eye and tell me I'm not alone, and it'll be okay._

_When I reached for you in the dream, you growled lowly, a hauntingly familiar sound, and then you turned as I wanted._

_You were one of /them/. You looked at me hungrily, and even though you looked weak just as you had as a human, you were able to pin me like you've always been able too, despite your size._

_With your perfect teeth an inch from tearing open my throat I awoke._

_Please be okay…. I promise, one day I'll see your face again._

_I love you_

_~Mariah_

I closed the journal and swallowed back my tears, collecting myself. With a final sigh, my legs remembered how to move and I carried myself from the room.

Lo and behold, I seemed almost myself enough to dance around Shane's form heading out of the game room. Unluckily, I wasn't completely aware yet and caught my foot against his, stumbling into his chest.

Shane raised an eyebrow, looking worn and uneasy but joking nonetheless. "Should I be getting used to this?"

My neck got hot as I pulled myself away, clearing my throat and taking another shy step back. "I'm sorry."

He looked confused for a minute and then cleared his expression and placed a smirk on his face. "Ah, no need." I noticed the red on the tips of his ears. Was he embarrassed?

I swiftly passed him then, my mind beginning to reboot at break neck speed. Was Crusader okay? Was Melissa… alive? What about her child? Was it safe here? Could I stay with these people? Should I?... Why was I still alive, when many people were no longer? No one of importance was sparred by the walker massacre. Why had I been?

Maybe I was right. Maybe we had all been abandoned by whatever being was once watching over us. Of course, I'd always believed this. There was just some part of me that liked the idea of protection, no mater where I should go. I just wanted a defender. Alone, I was only weak. So I just believed in the angels. Did I even have faith in that? Or just hope?

I fixed the hem of my shirt, and let my hair down from the knotty pony tail it had become during my restless sleep. I ran my fingers through the sweaty curls, enjoying the sensation of less strain on my head- it helped with the pounding in my head.

An unfamiliar sound resonated from the big entry room. I was almost used to snarling, groaning, and wheezy breathing left, right, and center. But never screaming. Not in this kind of a world. Usually it was just me, myself, and the geeks.

Approaching the door, my ears pricked at the mention of my name. I turned my head towards the door to understand whatever it was that I was going to walk into.

"There is no hope." A monotone, emotionless voice dragged. "I'm doing your group and Mariah a favor, but before we discuss this, there's something I want you to see."

"We aren't interested in your fancy computer pictures." That must've been Daryl.

I nearly screamed as a hand dropped on my shoulder and twisted with a sharp breath, surprised to find the metal rod already in my hands, held back like I was about to swing. I didn't realize I'd grabbed my pack and swing it over my shoulders on my way from the room. That would be a habit hard to break.

Shane looked at me with steady grey-brown eyes and I stiffened in shock at his proximity and silence when approaching, and then turned my head back to the door, eager to catch up on what I'd missed.

I listened a moment longer than shook my head and knocked into the door, throwing it open with my weight, and looked around quickly for any sign of danger.

Shane was right by my side, gun drawn and held at the ready, moving from the screen, to the computers, to the doctor. He narrowed his eyes and cocked the gun, the click heard clearly in the silence. Everyone else was staring at the screen in horror, or curiosity, either way they were watching.

A grey, black, and white picture came onto the screen, of a test subject I assumed, the skull a typical human shape, alive with colors of signals and electricity; very healthy, compared to some smokers, drinkers, and reckless abusers. Growing up with a family of all doctors, I knew this from a quick glance.

The head snapped in a new direction, the body shook in agony, shoulders rising and falling roughly. As I noticed this new alteration, another part of my sight cataloged the colors fading into black in the subjects head. The doctor's face grew grim, his fingers clenching on the top of the keyboard.

Heads bowed when the subject fell still, empty, death overcame the form. There was a moment of utter nothingness, signaling the end of her last breath.

It sickened me when I saw the spark of red flashed in the center of her head, filling half the space of the last existence, sparking the currents that kept the creature alive and moving. And the subjects head rose off the desk, and a line sunk into its skull, all life and movement ceased.

"They changed." I commented. "That's the test results?"

"The cleanest." Dr. Jenner replied, his jaw taut. "We lost many scientists to the cause, and they all volunteered to this procedure once they knew they were doomed."

"Who was that?" I asked. He stiffened and turned his back to me. All of the group's eyes were settled either on him or me.

"My wife." He walked to the right, to his desk and picked up the golden framed picture of him and a beautiful woman, smiling and staring up at him. The sun was playing in the background, sparkling on the water.

I shuffled my weight from one foot to the other, trying not to look at the screen any longer, picturing her form and no longer just the black image of the test subject. "She was beautiful." I offered.

He grunted. "In a world like this, beauty ceases to mean anything anymore. She was, but more importantly she was brilliant, and clever." He turned to us finally, eyes decided. Before I knew what he was doing his hand pressed a button and all the doors were barred with thick metal.

"Eight minutes until constitute wide cleansing." Vi's voice swept through the confines after the slam of metal against the floor.

"Are we locked in?" Glenn panicked, appearing to have just entered the room.

"What the hell!" Daryl roared. Shane looked around at all the doors closing, and then jogged over to the door and shot at the hinges; the blow seemed to shatter the resolve of everyone else in the room that hadn't out bursted yet.

"Wait, what is this cleansing?!" Rick yelled.

Jenner sat down on his computer chair, staring lifelessly up at the doors. "The only way we can cleanse this institute, is to ensure nothing remains. We will be bathed in fire… we will extinguish all signs of the virus in the immediate proximity."

I drew in a sharp gasp, my face settled in shock. There was no way I was going to lose my life now, without a fight, giving up. Not after all I did to get here. There was no way…

"This isn't your choice!" I shrieked, stalking towards him, standing right before him. "We want to live! We want to fight!"

"I'm sorry, but you need to understand that this is the only way. Think about it, one simple second, and it's gone. No agony, no pain, no drawn out torture. Just an end."

"Six minutes remaining."

Rick was arguing with him still, and I heard Shane, T-Dog and Daryl beating on the door out. I crossed my arms, bowing my head and standing between Jenner and the mother's, each holding their respective son and daughter. He looked up at me, seeing them behind me, and I saw his resolve weakening.

"She doesn't deserve to die!" Carol yelled, clutching Sophia to her chest.

Lori was speaking to Carl with tears in her voice, trying to soothe him as best she could.

"Four minutes."

Rick shook my head. "Jenner! We aren't forcing you out with us. We just want a chance to decide our own fates. We won't question yours. You could come with us, or you could stay. Just please, please."

"Two minutes remaining." Echoed in everybody's head. Anxiety increased.

"Are you sure?" The doctor asked, looking at Rick's choice as the group's leader, and then at me.

I nodded silently. "We are more than sure. We fought our way through hell for this." Rick added.

Another long minute passed. "One minute. Fifty-nine…. Fifty eight…."

Daryl's crowbar collided with the door one last time, and then it opened. The majority of the people rushed to the door. I paused and took the time to turn back to Jenner, seeing his hand was settled on the release button for the doors, but seeing he wanted his end now. He didn't want to live without his friends, without his love. I understood that.

But when I noticed Andrea and Dale sitting on the ground, I flushed in confusion and rage. I wanted so badly to scream at her to get the hell up, that she wasn't the only one suffering in pain. But I knew it was her choice, and the older man- Dale- would stay with her if she so decided, but would not leave without her.

I turned and bolted, the countdown deafening to me. One minute. One minute to rush through the walkers, to get to Crusader, to ride far enough away that we would survive the impact.

That time came back to me in flashes. Jumping through the glass as it spilled from the explosion, before any of the group recovered. Feeling tiny shard embed themselves into my shoulder. My feet hitting the ground as the burn increased in my lungs. Cruise's whinnying as I mounted him, and with his freedom he cantered with a new-found vengeance away from the institute. The cold air whipping across my face. And Crusader thrown forward and tripping a little, even from the impressive distance we had gone. The heat was blistering against my back, but we kept going.

And the memories. Shane's voice, his smile at me. Daryl's blue gaze landing on me, nodding when I went to bed. Sophia's little face, her warmth when I danced with her in my arms. Glenn laughing and hugging me, music blaring in the background. Carl appraising me on my way in, his friendly grin when I let him dance with Sophia. I hoped that group had made it out. In a night, I had come to slightly worry for them, and that worried me. But I did really, truly hope that those good people prospered, even after this man's devastating reality check was placed on them.

And we rode on.

* * *

~AU: I'm so sorry it took this long to update! But originally when I wrote this story I meant for it to start at Hersel's farm. I got more ideas that didn't make sense, unless Mariah had been there before. Now that I've filled that gap, however, I can post a minimum of at least three chapters as an update now and I will try to keep a regular upsate pattern.

Oh, and also: Daryl, I'm not even giving you a choice. Get your little redneck behind back to Carol and stop your asskickers crying. Now. That is all~


	7. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Without hesitation, when I became within sight of an old abandoned house, I jumped off of Cruise -falling to the ground because my legs were numb and sore at the same time. I'd ridden through the night after the explostion at the CDC, and hadn't found a safe hideaway yet. I was exhausted, nearly worn thin, as I worked my way up to the cottage. I realized with worry that the door was already busted open.

I slowly kicked open the slightly ajar door and raised the metal weapon over my shoulder at the ready. Without warning a small dark shape emerged and broke past me.

I gasped and swung but made no contact. It couldn't've been a walker, those geeks didn't move that quickly.

"Is anyone out there?" I called out. It could've been just an animal, I rationalized. "I'm sorry if I scared you." I apologized into the dark autumn air, cooling as the sun went down and the moon came out.

Nonetheless I let it go after a few seconds, eager to find shelter. I jogged out into the forest again to lead Crusader in, as there was a broken picket fence and within that a gate probably used for a dog once upon a time, but it was perfect to keep him safe. I lead him in and took out some oats and two apples for him to feed on in the mean time, but my food supply was running low.

I walked around at the ready, surveying the house from outside. From what I could see it was safe, and the only problem I had set out was the hungry sounds of the walkers out a few meters into the darkness. Without further ado I walked up to the door to go into the house.

"Wait!" Someone's voice answered me, startling me. It was a young voice, slightly high-pitched. I looked and saw a head of strawberry blond hair running up to me. It was a little girl wearing a blue shirt with a rainbow on front and a pair of khakis. I looked at her in confusion and knelt to her level, which wasn't very hard; I was only five foot four.

The little girl came up to me and threw her arms around me, fisting her tiny hands in my black sweater.

"Help me! Please! I got separated from my family and... There's walkers everywhere." she sobbed, looking up at me with big blue eyes. I put an arm around her and hoisted her up to sit on my hip.

"Is the cottage clear?"

She nodded. That saved me the hassle. I set her up on a counter of the kitchen when we entered. As we walked in it was a kitchen, living room open space. To the back was a door that must've headed to a bathroom.

"Are you bit?"

She shook her head.

"May I check?" I asked politely. She hesitated but let me look over her arms. She had blood on her, but it wasn't her own so I relaxed a bit. Once I was positive she was okay I smiled down at her. "Remember me?"

She looked up with those fearfu; eyes, and recognition flashed as she looked me over. "Mariah!" She threw her arms around me, then, holding me closely. I hugged her back, and then pushed away to take care of her.

Slipping my bag over my shoulder in front of me, I let her paw through all the food I'd been given, or collected in my brief travels. When she chose a can of ravioli, I opened it with a knife and found her a spoon, warning her to be careful of the sharp edges.

This little girl was understanding and quiet, I noted. I could help her and she wouldn't cause me much trouble.

"Where was your group headed?"

"I... I think it was Fort Ben-something."

"Fort Benning?"

"Yeah." She confirmed around a mouthful of ravioli.

"Well how about that. I'm headed there too." I said with a grin.

She was elated at this news and jumped into talking about her family and friends in her group. She was especially close to Carl, and she still had her mother, Carol.

"My Mommy is definitely lookin' for me! And Carl too, he's strong, he tells me all the time! And mister Daryl, he likes to be alone and searching anyway. He would do the job to make my Mommy happy."

I laughed. "Well why're you so worried, then, sweetheart?" I ruffled her hair. "You have a great chance at going back to your Mom. And even Daryl and the others."

"Mister Daryl doesn't like to have friends. Mom says he's tough around the edges, but he does care. But now I have you, too!"

I smiled. She was still so young that she shined with innocence; something I hadn't seen since I'd left home. That was nearly a month ago, and my eighteenth birthday had been and gonesomewhere in the midst of my travels. I wasn't even sure of the date anymore. The service on my cell phone was cut when the world shut down, nearly no one surviving anymore.

I'd had many more run-ins since leaving my hometown, and it never got easier. They always had that same horrible scent. The stench of rotting flesh and death, it's what I remember the most. I tried not to look them in the eyes as I killed them, I had to make it as thoughtless as I could so I wouldn't feel the crushing grief for the things that had once been people. Though I was capable of leaving home and of survive the apocalypse on my own for this long, I was still soft and weak on the inside. There's only so much strength you can have in a world like this.

More than once food had become a problem, but I could raid what was remaining in the homes or cottages I'd passed. Most things had gone bad long before I'd arrived, or were destroyed or already stolen. I knew I wasn't going to last much longer running the path I was. I was going into heavier woods, and there would be little civilization and an even slimmer chance to find food, but also less geeks.

There was only one big problem that I didn't plan for, but I didn't consider it more than just a brief passing thought because I knew it would definitely have the potential to throw me over the edge. Why was I still living? Why do I live?

Sophia finished her food and handed it to me with a grin I returned.

"You should sleep." I requested, reaching in my pocket and grabbing my flashlight. It had gotten darker than even before. I hadn't noticed, too lost in my thoughts.

She sighed, but not in irritation or defiance. More like she knew how tired she was, but it would be a lost cause. I knew exactly how that felt.

However she obliged and slipped into her make shift bed on the couch, slipping a big coat over her like a blanket. From here I could smell the mold and mildew on the damp article of clothing.

I grimaced. "Hope you aren't too attached to that, Sophia, but here. Take my sweater."

I took off the black sweater I had worn and handed her the clothing. She immediately put it on and curled up in a ball so her toes disappeared. It was pretty big on her, and only then did I realize how truly thin and boney she was. How long had she been missing for, anyway? She picked up a doll she had safely placed under a couch cushion.

I fixed the sweatshirt I was wearing underneath the sweater over my tank top, and quickly looked her over just once more. "Here." I pulled out a brush I had packed with me. "Use this."

Once again she did what she was told without a word of protest and handed the brush back to me. I packed it away and went to lean on the counter, which had a view of everything outside, and of the whole interior of the house. Along the wall in front of me were windows, leading to a dip in the structure that adorned a small couch that Sophia was sleeping on, with a fireplace parallel to it on the other wall. I gave it a second glance but thought against lighting it up. We would be cold, but safer in the mean time.

I sat atop the counter, crossing my legs and sitting the backpack in front of me, wrapping my arms around it and resting my chin.

"Come morning we will go to look for your Mommy, if you know the way. But I am here now, Sophia. Good night."

"Goodnight, Mya." She breathed, more than half asleep. I stayed silent, knowing she would fall asleep soon.

After a few minutes of silence, she whispered. "Mya?"

"Yes?" I answered.

"Can you sing me a lullaby?" Sophia requested, surprising me.

"Ehm, is there a certain song your Mom sings to you?" I asked gently.

"Yeah, hush little baby." She said.

I nodded to myself, eyes settled on her dark huddled form on the couch. "Okay."

Softly, unsurely, I hummed to her, and after I became a little more comfortable, I sang out loud quietly. Even after she was asleep, I sang to her more, a song that closely reminded me of her song, but that I'd heard sang to me many times before by my own Daddy.

She was long since asleep and I kept whispering, and then falling silent and singing it slowly in my head. I would give anything just to hear music played once again. The world was all silence and sounds of horror now. I would love to tune it out.

Just like every night since the end of the world, I thought of home, shed a tear, until I tired myself out and fell into a light slumber.


	8. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

I winced against the rays of sun hitting my face, quickly sitting up in surprise and gazing outside.

The sun was halfway up to it's highest point. "Shit, I usually don't sleep this long, I'm sorry Sophia." I apologized and got up to go get her.

I looked over the edge of the couch, not seeing her. I jumped off the high counter and slung the bag over my back, walking over to look closer. She wasn't there, or anywhere in the house I realized after a thorough investigation.

"Sophia!" I walked out the door and called into the brisk morning air. "Sophie?!"

I heard giggling next to the house and was about to turn and scold her, but I was so happy to realize she wasn't hurt that I almost smiled a little at her laughter.

"Sophie! Don't just leave me like that." I scolded a little, walking around the house to see that she had found Cruise and was rubbing his nose when he poked it out. She appeared to be having a conversation with him.

"Who's a pretty boy?" She'd ask and his head would remain still. "Are you a pretty boy?" She'd ask after he had no answering gesture and he would give a great nod and nicker at her.

"I see you met Crusader." I chuckled and she spun around.

"Yeah, morning Mariah!" She chirped and swung around to hug me around the waist. She was very affectionate. "Are we gonna go look for Mama now?"

"Yes, we can leave now if you'd like."

"Yay!" She cheered.

I opened the gate, "Be careful. You don't want to startle him. Stay away from his rear end, and don't shy away."

She nodded quickly and I walked in. "Hey Cruise baby." I cooed and his ears perked up. I knelt down and lifted one of his hooves to clean out before the long journey. He leaned forward and Sophia gasped and took a step back. He tossed his head.

"Oi, what did I say?" I reminded and she stepped back up. I dropped his hoof and headed for the back one.

"Hey pretty boy." She cooed like I had and reached up to rub down his snout.

He stayed still and nudged her hand. She twitched away but stopped herself and reached further to stroke where his jaw was set and then to his neck. He pressed his head into her chest when her arm was at his side and she laughed happily, wrapping her arms under his chin and hugging him.

"He likes me." She laughed freely as I finished up.

"He sure does. What a good pony." I teased him and laughed when he snorted. One thing I loved about this horse was he had personality.

"Do you want to get on first, or do you want me to?" I asked.

Her eyes lit up. "We're riding him?" She asked with wonder.

"Hell yeah. He's meant for this." I tapped his head and he lowered it for me to rub his neck.

"I… I dunno how," She told me.

"That's okay. Here." I mounted him, putting my one foot in and swinging myself up to hoist myself. "Now use your left foot, and put it into that loop." I informed her. She did as asked and I grabbed her hand. "Now swing your other leg over."

She successfully mounted with a light huff of air leaving her. She looked down and out at everything in amazement. "Woah." She breathed.

We rode out into the open picket fence and through the broken gate that once would have perfectly secured the cottage. There weren't any disturbances that I could see yet, there was a thin tree line for some distance.

Sophia spoke excitedly behind me, her little hands resting on my hips. She was such a happy kid, and strong.

"I…"

Her sudden trailing off had me tensing, and I looked back at her to see her looking off into the distance to our right, and on cue Cruise clenched and reared forward a little bit. I patted his neck and Sophia started trembling a little.

I looked back at the walker, hoping he didn't hear or smell us. I jumped in horror when his head snapped up quickly and stared right at me.

"Yaw!" I urged Cruise forward and he was only too happy to do as I asked. Sophia bounced, not ready for the sudden take off, but I reached back and grabbed her before she could fall. This sudden movement threw me off and I tumbled , tucking her close to my chest to break her fall and took all the impact to my mid back. The air rushed out of me and I coughed. The walker was still rushing towards us.

"Run!" I coughed and she got up from my grasp, tugging at my hand.

"No, you have to come with me! C'mon, please!" She cried.

"I'm fine, go!" I half whispered, catching my breath still.

She took off, stumbling towards the river. She fell in the water and dropped her doll before rushing up the bank of the stream on the other side which was a good few feet high but on a slant and manageable.

I regained my breath and stood up, but the walker was too close to me. I stumbled back and realized my weapon was still in my backpack. I ran a little bit and the walker sped up in response. I quickened and swung the bag over me, keeping tabs on my speed and what was around me. I grabbed the bar and threw my bag to the side, spinning around and nailing the walker right in the head with an audible crack and squish. It fell, not comprehending what was happening and growled at me still, crying out for my flesh.

"Gah!" I screeched and drove the bar down into its head, the final blow. Its blood splattered over my face and I whipped under my nose to drive off the nasty scent. I shivered, looking down at the mess I created before turning away, gagging.

After I collected myself, I looked around. Everything was gone. My eyes widened and I looked down at the place where my bag had been thrown, and where it now lay down the side of the steep drop to the river.

"Shit!" I cussed, carefully trying to shimmy my way down, but before I could get far I realized it was useless. I sat down, staring at the scene in shock. I felt like all my memories had just been washed away.

The books were scattered down the hillside, but close enough. If I just reached….

My shock turned to relief as I realized there was a clear path. I slid half way down on my butt but I was able to grab my bag and pull myself up into the path by the thin roots and branches of the trees.

The bag was soaked through, most paper was destroyed. But the bow and arrows were okay, and the bag would dry. I also realized the songbook was the safe item that hit the top when the bottom half hit the water. I took it out and hugged it to my chest, happy at least it was okay, and hung the bag over one shoulder. I kept it at a distance so it didn't get me damp.

"Cruise!" I whistled for him. "Cruise! Are you okay? Cruise, baby!"

I heard a soft neigh in the distance and picked up a jogging pace to get to him, and then booked it when I didn't care anymore. I could take a little bit of damp and cold, I just needed to get to my companion.

"Crusader!" I yelled again, and halted when I saw his reigns were being held. I looked around the tree and saw another horse, with a rider.

She was pretty, with her brown-red hair in a bob that cut off at her jaw and wondering brown eyes with a hard edge as she looked me over.

"He yours?" She asked after sizing me up.

"Yes." I answered shortly, reaching out for his reigns. She handed them to me and I stroked his neck. He shoved me over a bit and a side of my mouth quirked a bit. I mounted him.

"I'm Maggie." She introduced herself. "And I would love to stick around and chat, but this woman needs to get to her husband and son. Daddy told me to hurry."

"One question, before you go. Have you seen a little girl, with light brown hair, wearing a blue shirt?" I asked.

The woman behind Maggie stirred. "Sophia?" She asked.

This woman was thin framed, almost too thin, with dark, long, messy hair and blue almost almond shaped eyes. She had thin lips and a small nose. It was Lori.

"Yeah…Sophia. Is the rest of the group nearby?" I looked between the two of them.

"No, but come with us." The woman ushered me, and looked at Maggie for confirmation. Maggie only sighed. "You best hurry up, then."

"Cruise isn't one to wait." I defended him and she took off, me closely following.

As we rode, the woman who was passenger huffed when Maggie's horse touched down each time, not accustomed to the feeling of the stride, but Maggie and I conversed.

"What's your name?" She jerked her chin toward me to indicate who she was talking to.

"Mariah. Or Mya. I've been called both." I shrugged.

"You alone."

"Yup." I answered, popping the 'P'. I looked behind her at the woman who looked like she wanted to throw up with unease. "Are you alright?" I asked her, turning to face forward, steering Cruise clear of a tree.

"N-No." She gasped.

We rode into an open field and Maggie showed me the way to weave through to make it past a small well, through high grass, and where the gate was into the fence. She dismounted cleanly and helped Lori off the horse. As soon as her feet hit the ground she was running to the house in full hysterics without so much as a thank you. I raised an eyebrow.

"The stables are over there." She pointed, and I nodded, following her into them. She let her horse loose and left without another word, eager to go help with whatever was needed.

I, on the other hand, took the time to cross chain him up and clean him with the supplies they had. It was an awful lot more than I had given him in a long time.

After that, I let him go, thinking about Sophia. There was no way I could've reached her, horseback or otherwise. She had already scrambled up the other hill and taken off in that direction. Hopefully she would return and when she did, I would be there for her just like I had been last night. She was a good kid and people were waiting on her. It wasn't fair to leave them empty handed.


	9. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

I leaned against the fence, staring at a window to the house that I could hear a huge commotion uprising from. Two men were talking and arguing, and then there was a silence. Occasionally I could hear cries of "Carl, oh my baby!" and she'd start sobbing again. I didn't wince at her pain, but instead felt a dull ache anyway.

At least she had her family, and she could fight with her husband and see her son through this. Some people didn't even get that chance. Her pain could be eased, while some people's just went on.

I don't know how long I just sat there, sitting in the middle of the space between the barn and the house, staring blankly at the window before I bowed my head and stared at my hands while someone approached me.

"H-H-Hi there." A girl stuttered and I looked up at her. She seemed genuinely nervous to be standing in front of me, talking to me.

"Hello." I replied softly, trying not to scare the poor thing. She was a petite blond with shoulder length blond hair.

"W-would you... I mean do you want to take a shower?" She forced out and I smiled up at her.

"That sounds amazing right now." I stood up, standing just a little taller than her. Maybe an inch or two difference between us. "My name is Mariah." I told her.

"I… I'm Beth." She answered me quietly. "The shower is just down the hall, the second door to your right."

After she spoke she scurried off, and I looked after her in confusion. Obviously she was scared of me. But why?

'_You were just staring into her house for a good ten minutes'_

'Good point, me.' I patted myself on the back and rolled my eyes. I needed to collect myself. It had just been so long since I'd been around other survivors.

I walked in with my bag and briefly looked around at the people I was walking past before ducking my head down and hurrying through. My turn to be shy, I suppose.

There was little difficulty to find the bathroom and once there I looked at myself in the mirror. My features were marred with dirt and blood, my lips chapped. There were dark bags under my eyes from not sleeping well recently, and my hair was knotted and greasy. It had been a hell of a long time since I'd taken the time to stop and just bathe and now I regretted it. I looked terrible.

I slipped the sweatshirt and tank top over my head and dropped them to the ground, checking myself for scratches or bruises. It seemed I was safe. Just a few bruises and scars I'd had even before this shit all started.

I kicked off my shoes and winced at how bloody and blistered my feet were. The hot water was going to sting. Then I slowly peeled off the rest of my remaining clothing and turned on the water.

Once I stepped in I winced and moved in aggravation. The dirt was literally so thick on my skin in some places that the water was coming off me grey and brown for the longest time, and now that I felt how it was to be clean I was relieved to be able to wash off all the grime. The soap was like a dream, and the shampoo. It was surprising how much I missed something as simple as being able to shower. It only reminded me of how much things had changed.

When I was clean I sat in the flow of warm water for just a moment longer, not wanting to waste their supply and be greedy, but just needing to relieve a little bit of tension in my shoulders. Then I shut off the water and stepped out.

I dressed quickly, pulling on a pair of sweat pants and a new tank on. I pulled on a dark green hoodie with a John Deere symbol on the front.

My feet were torn to shreds, it was a mess. It hurt like hell, and I knew I would be much better for everyone if I were able to walk. I looked into the medicine cabinet just over the toilet and peeked in. To my luck there were wrap bandages I could put on, and I took no time in doing so. I couldn't help but sigh longingly, wishing there was polysporin or something like that here. But I was grateful for what I'd already gotten.

I shook out my hair and took a little set of trimming scissors, thinning the edges of my hair first and finally trimming my bangs so they were out of my face. And for a last little touch and a little treat I put on some lip balm I had and felt instant relief through the cuts and cracks on my lips. Let me tell you, I looked 85% better, and I was happy with myself.

I pulled on some long socks and the combat boots I had taken from a shoe store I'd run into after my runners gave and tore at the lip. I'd loved those shoes, but these were better.

For a moment after I packed my stuff away into my bag, I leaned against the counter and really realized all the good things that had happened to me since being alone to travel until now, and I felt a little bit more content. It could've been much worse than it already was and I knew it.

Walking out into the hall and past the faces I saw a few eyebrows rise as they could now probably see my face, and made their judgments of me. I didn't much care as I walked outside and sat in the October air, balancing while crossing my legs and sitting on the railing of the porch. The air gusted by while the golden sun faded to orange and dropped over the tree line, swirling through my hair and drying it out. Nature still had its way of replacing everything we couldn't have automatically anymore.

With a breath my mind wandered to thoughts of Sophia, the dark, and the inevitable; Walkers. Grimacing I glowered out into the dark. I still didn't know how it was fair to damn us all.


	10. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

I had my head in my hands, sitting next to Maggie on the steps to the front porch. I hadn't been able to sleep and I was so exhausted from nightmares and the lack of sleep I was getting.

"You don't mind me being here, right?" I asked her, lifting my head to look at her. "I don't mean to invade."

"No, no. Daddy hasn't a problem with any of you people. It's just a lot to take in, is all."

I nodded in understanding and glanced back towards the house. "The boy is going to be okay then?"

"Daddy's got him."

"You're very lucky, you know, to have your Father, your sisters, and some friends."

"I know." Maggie agreed and I sighed in remembrance and touched the cross around my neck.

"They're back!" a voice informed us and I looked up to see a man running out to meet a small group entering the farm.

"He's a loud one." Maggie murmured. "I believe his name is Glenn."

I answered absently as he asked a man on horse back hurried questions and filled in a woman who was riding passenger. Crusader nickered at the sight of the other horse from his stall and I shushed him, getting up and walking over to the stables to calm him. He walked over to me as I approached. As I stood up on the second bar of the fence to reach over to touch him, he nudged me in the gut a bit. He placed his head against my chest, pressing into me. I hugged him back and pulled a hand through his mane. He would always be my boy. He was the only person from home I had left.

"Am I ruining a moment?" Someone asked. I looked up and saw the man that had been on horseback. Slung across his back was a crossbow and he was guiding the horse into the stable. It was Daryl.

In the sun, he had short cropped sandy blond hair that was dark with sweat and a smirk on his face. For such a gruff appearance, however, he had very darling blue eyes that intrigued me. He looked gruff, but in a suitable way.

"Yes. This horse has been all I've had for these months." I replied, my eyes back on Cruise who was turning to look at the other horse, but keeping close enough for me to rest a hand on his neck.

He looked me over. "No 'ffence meant but… How'd someone like you survive the world going to shit?"

"Right place, right time. And I had a head start." I suppose that was true.

He grunted in disbelief but didn't push it. I appreciated that.

"And what of you?" I prodded.

He raised an eyebrow. "What of me?"

"Where do you come from? How did you survive?"

He took the saddle off the horse and he answered me as he worked. "I come from here, with my Brother we lost here a little while back."

It wasn't a lot, but now I knew he wasn't a man of many words. This was definitely something I needed to know.

Nonetheless, I continued to speak, drabbling on just for the filling of the empty silence. "It's beautiful here, when you see around all the bullshit that's been thrown our way. I suppose if you are an indoors person you don't see its true side though. Nowadays, we don't exactly have a choice. But still, the world spins on."

He side glanced at me, looking me over once again, "Got anyone?"

Most people would have been gentler on the topic but somehow I didn't expect it from him anyways. I looked up at him and slowly shook my head without an explanation.

"'m sorry to hear that." His accent showed a little when he said this. Or maybe I'd never noticed it before. "The name's Daryl."

My head snapped up to look at him. "Was the woman with you Carol by any chance?"

Daryl's eyes flashed up to me.

"Sophia-" I spoke hurriedly. "I met her at a cabin a little ways from here. I tried to bring her back but she ran and I couldn't get to her when we had a run in with one of the geeks. We were down by the stream." Maybe there was still a chance she would've been near to there.

He cursed under his breath and ran out of the stables and towards Carol. When he spoke her eyes automatically filled with tears. Carol stumbled and ran over to me, "Thank you, thank you." She cried repeatedly and almost collapsed but I caught her at the last moment. I patted her back and soothed her, watching Daryl as he turned back from heading into the woods. With a final glance at Carol, he looked up at me and nodded, then disappeared to go search for the poor missing little girl.

The little boy who had suffered from being shot was now awake and stable. Lori was cuddled up to his side in hysterics once again. The poor woman was a mess, but she didn't supply much of a help to the camp anyways, I realized. She was a family woman and that was that. I respected it as much as I grimaced at the fact.

There was a man who all but appointed himself leader, Rick Grimes, Lori's husband. He used to be a sheriff and his best friend was deputy Shane Walsh. Both of them loved Lori unconditionally.

Andrea was a beautiful girl with longer blond hair and nice features, a confident look on her face, and she was well guarded and loved by a man named Dale. She was a girl who wanted to contribute to the group in any way, shape, or form she could manage, always tinkering with her gun and silently checking up on Shane. Something told me there was tension rushing through the group just as I'd arrived.

Dale was an old man with a cold stare of a warm smile. You knew one of them well. He wasn't keen on the idea of Shane being around any of his group and especially not Andrea. It was a shame… I could see Andrea and Shane had something going on, even if they were unsure of it also at the time.

Along with them was a man named Glenn, the man who had asked Daryl the questions when he'd first arrived back. Glenn was only a few years older than me, and he was working up to having a strong bond with Maggie. He looked to be of a distinct descent, with almond shaped eyes and full lips. I didn't want to judge, I'd have to ask him later.

Maggie was one of Hershel's daughters; the other being Beth. Maggie was very strong and feisty as well as pretty, even at the first glance I got of her I could tell that. And Beth was the exact opposite; she was the picture of innocence and fear in a world that had gone far too cold for her.

We were currently taking residence at Hershel's farm. He was the owner of the farmhouse where Carl was currently being treated, as it was what Rick had found and ran to when Carl had first been shot. He was a man of little action but he knew what he was capable of. He managed to keep two of his daughters, but lost his wife and other people as well. Neighbors, friends. They all had meant something to him, and all of them impacted him greatly.

Carol had patiently filled me in after she was done crying and now we sat in contentment, just watching what was happening. She had short dark hair and wide doe eyes, much like Sophia's own eyes. I could tell by her gentle tone and the look in her eyes as she looked at each of them, explaining them, that she was motherly to them all. Carol was the caretaker of the group.

What was happening as of now, was that Carl was safe, which used to be a great concern. But Otis hadn't come back with Shane when he brought back the medical supplies needed so we suffered a loss at the same time. And soon Daryl would return with news about Sophia, and the day would come to an end.

"That's how it is for us. In numbers we have losses and many injuries as well as safety and greater health than we could have alone. We've never had anyone go missing, though. I appreciate Daryl being so persistent for me. He's a good man."

I side glanced at her with a curious expression. "Are you guys together?"

"Heavens no!" She gasped and laughed. "I don't think he's one for love anyways. Why do you ask?"

I nodded. "I dunno. It just seems he's so devoted to you and your little girl out there."

Carol smiled slightly. "He is."

"Sophia told me you said he was rough around the edges." I said with a laugh.

Her smile became a little sad. "Tell me, how was she when you saw her?"

I choked up in pain. I hadn't known it then but just when I picked her up I'd had Carol's whole life in my arms. "Well… I scared her at first. She ran off and hid but came out after a while. I sat her down, and checked for bite marks. She had one of my cans of Ravioli and I got her to brush her hair and put on my sweater. She went to sleep after that, but she got me to sing for her. And then on the way here we had a run in and I was useless for a second so I told her to run. That was the last I saw her." I admitted, wishing I could tell her more and make her feel better. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be, you did more for that little girl than was ever expected. I can't thank you enough. As far as I'm concerned, you are already more than welcome here." Carol confided and I was touched.

"That means a lot." I answered truthfully.

She stood up after I said that and looked out into the woods intently, her lips set in a thin, straight line. I searched for what could have signaled her quick movements, staring where she was.

And then it all made sense when a familiar red neck stepped out of the bushes, swinging a flashlight around with the crossbow slung over his back. He was looking up at the sky with a disgruntled, angry expression. Probably cursing whatever was up there for being so cruel to him and the ones he cared about.

Carol trudged up slowly, and I walked at her pace, keeping by her side.

"You were on the right path then?" I guessed, reaching out. He handed me the flashlight.

"That's yers I'm guessin'?" He asked. I nodded in answer.

He turned to Carol. "I found that." He watched her silently thinking and his jaw clenched. "And, um, I didn't find anything else, but there was no sign of a struggle. She might still be safe."

Carol nodded and tears swept down her cheeks. "Thank you Daryl." She reached out and touched his face, and he flinched away from the gesture a little bit, obviously not used to it.

It was an intense moment, and I felt like I didn't belong and turned to head for the bon fire the Atlanta survivors set up in the middle of their camp. Everyone was there, look out was retired for the night. This was the warm up just before bed.

"Mariah, come sit." Maggie called me and I did. All eyes fell on me but I just smiled at them all and looked down intently at the cold ground and I sat down.

A man cleared his throat and I glanced up quickly to see it was Rick. "So, Mariah." He started. Rick was a position of authority; he was probably doing a background check like I'd seen so many times on those TV shows my Mom used to watch.

"Where do you come from?'"

I was right, apparently. "I come from Savannah."

He nodded. "Have any family there?"

"Mom, Dad, and my sister Melissa."

"Are any remaining?"

I bit my cheek. Was this really necessary? In front of all of these people? "No."

From the corner of my eye I saw Andrea turned to look at me amongst a few other people turning to watch this trade off silently.

Rick nodded in understanding. No, Mr. Officer, you don't understand. You have your family with you, don't you? "How old are you?"

"I'm twenty two." Many people looked surprised at this. I'm sure months in the wilderness and of emotional and physical pain would wear a person though. I felt ten years older than I was.

"How did you survive?" He asked incredulously, seeing me as being way younger than I actually was.

"Why don't you leave the girl alone, Rick? She's been through enough man. You know what you have to." The man with the buzz cut defended me. I shot him a grateful look, before realizing it was Shane. We shared a glance of realization. I must've looked different too.

The men glared at one another but Rick let it go and threw me an apologetic glance.

I crossed my legs and stared at my hands, resting in my lap, trying to suppress the memories Rick had just forcefully brought to the center of my mind again. I didn't want to think about those who I'd lost until I was at least out of the range of company. They didn't need my tears.

I moved back a little to rest my back on the wood box set up at a nice distance from the fire and free from the view of most people. I brought my backpack out and took my Dad's song book out, jumping when a cluster of photos fell to my lap. I glanced over them, lingering on one long thin one in particular, a group of four pictures I'd taken at a photo bench with Melissa.

In the first one she was making a peace sign and a duck face at the camera, and I kissed her cheek. The next one was us together cheek to cheek and looking away from the other. The third was her kissing my cheek and the last was us with our arms around the other's waist, serious looks on our faces.

I missed her so much. Once upon a time I could never have imagined life without her. Now that she was gone, I didn't even know how life went on and the world kept spinning.

"That your sister?" Andrea voice called me out of my thoughts.

"We aren't related, but yes. That is my sister, Melissa."

"I know the pain of losing a sister. I lost mine. Her name was Amy."

I couldn't speak for a minute then managed to choke out my previous thoughts. "At one time I couldn't even imagine her gone. Now, I don't know how life just simply goes on." I whispered.

Without warning, Andrea wrapped her arms around me. "I know exactly what you are talking about, Mariah. "

I shed a tear silently into her shoulder, and then another before I developed the strength to collect myself and pull back. She hugged me a little more.

"I need to go to bed." I dismissed myself. "Thank you, Andrea."

"I'm here if you need me to talk to." She promised. "As long as you'll be there for me?"

"I can try my best." I promised, smiling at her.

"Stick by me if anyone gives you trouble." Was her dismissing remark, and I nodded before heading out to find a place to sleep.

I didn't want to invade anyone's camp so I tried to find my own. I caught sight of an RV with a chair sitting on top. Climbing up the rusty ladder I found a relatively flat and safe rooftop, it would be useful enough. Shoving my bag under the chair to protect it from rain and so on, I curled up and used it as a pillow.

I fell asleep without hearing moans in the distance for once in, well, quite a while. But the nightmares didn't cease to bug me, and now a little girls voice interrupted the usually predictable situation, screaming and crying out for me.


	11. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Awareness hit me when the RV shuddered in a little bit of movement. I sat up quickly and grabbed my metal rod I had cuddled to my chest and swung it out beside me at the ready to bash in walker brains.

"Woah, chill girl." Shane calmed me, walking up. "It's my turn for look out, but points for scaring the shit out of me. Why are you up here?"

I lowered the rod and sighed a little in relief. "No reason. No other place to sleep so here seemed safe." I mumbled, rubbing sleep out of my eyes.

He chuckled. "That's fair. Oh, and good morning."

I flipped him off and he barked a laugh. "You got guts, kid. I like that."

I bowed. "Sorry if I seem like a royal bitch. I hate mornings."

"You and me both."

I huffed and grabbed my bag, jumping off the RV without the ladder and landing fine. Shane whistled and clapped for me. I bowed again and walked off grumbling. His laughter was loud in the quiet morning air.

The remains of last nights fire was where I headed, just looking for somewhere to relax in the mean time while I woke up. Sitting again by the wood bow I pulled the arrows out of my bag and sat down. Quicker than I used to be able to I pulled out and flipped open my pocket knife and grabbed an arrow. I fixed it just as I was once taught to sharpen a pencil if there weren't any sharpeners around. As an added touch I collected the shavings into one place to set in the pit for the fire tonight.

"Mornin'" Came from behind me and I jumped once again.

I growled to myself. What was with these people and scaring the living crap out of me every chance they got? Then again, I wasn't used to people being around, let alone living ones addressing me.

I looked up backwards and noticed it was Daryl, leaning on the other side of the wood box. He was studying the arrow I was sharpening.

I sighed. "Good morning, Daryl."

I nodded up at him. He circled around the box and sat next to me for the most part. There was still space between us for a person.

"Where'd ya get that?" He asked me.

"On the way out I grabbed these from my old school. They were cheap, just dulled them up for use. If you want you can have them, I'm more accustomed to my weapon anyway." I nodded my chin to my metal rod, sitting next to me on the ground.

"Ya can't be too out of range with a flimsy bow like that." He told me, and I agreed. I'd known that.

"There wasn't an excess stock of bows as strong as a crossbow." I mocked him a little with a smirk. "But I'm not sure how they're used anyways."

There was a silence as if he was pondering something I had said and the only noise was the chipping of the wood under my knife as I kept working.

Hesitantly, I saw him put the crossbow in front of him, and then hold it out to me a little. I looked up into his eyes carefully, reading his expression. He just seemed careful as usual, his eyes not betraying any hint of emotion. It was the look only a hunter could pull off.

I took the crossbow and weighed it gingerly in my hands, looking over it slightly. It was taut and ready to spring, I could feel just by holding it lightly all the power it contained.

Daryl quietly watched me examine it. I looked up at him smiling slightly and when he saw the awe in my eyes he mentioned a few things, explaining how it worked. He didn't seem cold, as long as you were patient he would eventually collect his thoughts and talk. Carol was right, he was rough around the edges, but I could see where he came from.

When he finished I nodded slowly. "Okay, thank you, Dare." I said with a grin,

"Dare?" He raised an eyebrow.

I nodded and yawned. I still wasn't awake yet. "You are now Dare to me. Get used to it." I mocked playfully and stuck out my tongue.

He chuckled. "You're such a kid. I don't even know your name yet, do I?"

"I dunno, do you?"

He rolled his eyes and ran a hand through his hair.

"My name is Mariah Evans."

He nodded, stood up, and left without another word. I smiled to myself. So far there was no one from the camp that I didn't like.

"Good morning, Mariah." A sugary sweet voice greeted me and I turned to see the woman with long dark hair and bright restful brown eyes.

"Hi Lori." I greeted.

"Did you sleep well?" She asked me, clearly wondering where I had slept in general.

"I slept just as well as any other night. And yourself?" I asked softly so my voice didn't harden defensively.

"Not too bad. Nightmares about losing my family, you know?"

I resisted the urge to roll me eyes. She had her family here. She couldn't relate to me, no matter how hard she tried.

"I dream of when I lost my family all the time. It's not something you easily forget."

She nodded. Seriously, who did she think she was to believe she understood the pain of loss when she still had everything she may have lost? It pissed me off.

Okay, scratch that, there must always be one person to break the streak. I wasn't too fond of Lori Grimes.

I took the time to finish the arrows I had so I wouldn't take any more spare time out of my hands. It seemed we had less and less of that each day. When I finished up I packed them away and got up to greet Carol, who was up and looking out blankly in to the woods.

"Hey." I greeted shyly, not sure how to approach this kind of situation. "Are you okay?"

"Oh, Mariah, I didn't see you coming." She was startled by my sudden appearance. "I'm fine, I'm just thinking. Worrying. I haven't been able to sleep without Sophia here."

I half smiled. "No offence but… I can tell." I eyed the dark bags under her eyes with a blush.

She smiled. "Yeah."

"I don't mean to bug you but do you know where I can set up camp?" I asked her. "And if there are any tents available?"

She stood up, fluttering her hands as she searched for what I asked for. "Oh yes of course! I'm sorry, I wasn't even thinking!"

"Oh, no no. It's really fine, honestly." I said, worried to make her distressed.

Carol pulled out a small one person tent she had stashed somewhere and handed it to me. "There are instructions in there, if you need me to help- "

"That's okay, Carol. You've done enough for me. But, thanks."

"You are very welcome, Mariah."

As I turned away from her retreating to the house to help with breakfast, my eyes scanned the grounds. Everyone was in a safe small radius, but I wasn't sure if I really belonged to this group yet. I'd only just gotten here, and I didn't trust them much yet.

I stole a spot a few feet from the wood box, to the empty side that wasn't in the way of the house. Set up took little time, it was something I'd gotten used to in a long shot. Not that is was rocket science but I did it even without the instructions. After I was content with my work I threw in my backpack into a corner. It wasn't much but I was glad to have it.

When I stepped out into the morning air again I saw Daryl walking by, armed and set on his mission by the look on his face.

"You're going to look for Sophia."

He stopped but didn't turn around.

"I can help." I told him.

Daryl didn't seem like the type of person to take time and answer questions. He was down to facts, evidence, and action. _If_ I was right.

"You don't even know her." He reminded me.

"You and Sophia weren't especially close either."

He turned around then, finally looking at me. "And how would ya know that?"

I held my head high, squaring my shoulders and standing straight. Proper posture was something I've learned was key, especially because I was short. I hated being belittled.

"Sophia told me about you when I met her at the cottage. She called you Mister Daryl, and she talked about Carl and her mother too."

Something filled his usually collected look for a brief second before he erased it. "Can you shoot?"

"I've got a good arm." I promised. "And I do care about her. She's a good kid."

He nodded. "Fine, just don't get in the way."

Daryl started to walk away without another word and I quickly followed at his lead, keeping pace with his strides and keeping a keen eye on things; including him.

Hunting with the hunter was just as interesting as it was dangerous. With such keen senses he was aware of more dangers than I ever was before, he would bristle at every one and decide if it were worth attacking or just passing by. Daryl liked to play this role, and I took the time to look for clues and call out for Sophia as we made our way to the creek.

"Sophia, Hun! Sophia!" I called out just loud enough to be heard a little distance out. The walkers wouldn't understand the voice; just hear the hum of the noise.

Daryl leaned down and checked something. I wanted to ask if he found something but just kept my thought to myself.

It took a minute but he stood up and looked around suspiciously and continued on.

I finally managed to force the question out a minute later. "Did you find anything?"

"If I did, you'd know."

Silence consumed us for the most part during the search so I wasn't surprised to be facing it once again now. But sooner than I would've expected, he spoke again and turned to look at me as he did so. Though being away from the group may have had some people on edge, Daryl seemed comfortable, more so than usual. I wasn't used to being around people now either, sadly, and under cover of the forest I was a little more at ease.

"I don' think there's much hope. Ain't never been."

"Why do you do this then?" I asked wondrously. Daryl didn't seem like the kind to go around helping out a hopeless cause, and I didn't expect Sophia to be an exception. Nonetheless I respected him for it, and I knew I would've done it in his position.

He huffed and looked around us in examination again. "Cause her Mother won' give me peace until she's back."

"Do you love Carol?" I asked bluntly, not seeing how he could be so committed to this little girl and her Mom and yet act so detached. I was just trying to figure him out.

"Hell naw!" He said exasperatedly and I couldn't suppress the giggle that slipped through my lips at how his drawl twisted around the words. "She keeps up that sobbin' an I can't sleep." He defended himself. When he heard my giggling fading off, he glared over at me and I quickly smoothed my expression into a poker face, amusing myself even more.

"It's more than just for your sake. You do care." I assured him, knowing he did and he just didn't want to admit it to himself, or maybe just to me.

He shrugged to blow off the topic. I bit my cheek to conceal a grin of satisfaction running over my face. The urge to let it free was so strong, but I had no idea where it came from.

He ended up startling me, turning quickly and shooting at something I didn't look at or care to inspect, I just settled my aim where he shot as a reflex instead of jumping out of my skin. Swiftly he went to the spot where the bushes were still swaying at the impact and picked up the now dead squirrel and retrieving his arrow.

"We might as well hunt while we're at it."

I glowered up at him.

"What?" He asked flatly, looking surprised at my expression.

"Warn me the next time you intend to give me a heart attack." I suggested breathlessly.

"If I intend to, why would I tell ya?" He chuckled I searched our surroundings again, my eyes darting over the scenery. While Daryl moved ahead I moved into the bushes a bit, into a place only a smaller body could fit into in hopes of finding some clue as to where the lost little girl with the wide blue doe eyes had gone.

"Mariah?" Daryl must've just realized I was missing. But the way my name sounded on his lips sounded good. Very good, and suddenly I found myself blushing like a fourteen year old instead of the twenty two year old I was.

"Don't shoot." I cautioned, stepping out of the shadows of the bushes.

"Christ, girl, don't do that." He growled. "Ya coulda been a walker's next meal, dealin' with me."

I rolled my eyes. "I can take care of myself, but I'm sorry that I scared you." I teased.

He grumbled to himself and we quickly got back to work. The forest opened up into a field of tall grass and flowers, the sun beat down from the sky. The warm was contrasting after walking in the shadows and I ended up pulling off my hoodie and tying it to my waist by the arms. I then proceeded to bring my long hair off my neck and into a high pony tail that fell well past my shoulders.

I raised my face to the sun and the wind, blowing perfectly around me, twisting my bangs backwards away from my eyes. Breathing a content sigh, I weighed my arrow in my palms and nocked a bow, looking around. I tested it, aiming at another squirrel I spotted a little ways away and let the taut string snap back, pushing the arrow away from me and through the air, hitting the squirrel and tearing through its back and through its belly. It stiffened before hitting the ground.

As we reached it I picked it up and took my arrow, tossing the carcass at Daryl who caught it easily. I smiled up at him for confirmation and he smirked.

When we started to move once again I shook my head. I didn't know what was wrong with me, acting like a teenager. I guess I always did have that youth factor to me, even after I was well into the real world and grown up.

Banishing away any other thoughts, the search went on that transitioned into a hunt when we finally realized we had to turn and go back empty handed to Carol if we wanted to make it there before dark. I could tell this didn't settle well with Daryl, and I wasn't fond of going back like this either.

Just as we went passed the open field, darkened as dawn fell and the sky got colourful, Daryl looked around once more and his gaze settled and lingered on something.

I tried to follow his gaze and tilted my head when I saw the elegant little white flower, a corner of my lips turning up. I glanced up to his face as I walked by and he looked down at me and watched me go fetch the beautiful flower.

When I came back I held out my hand, curling my fingers to motion for him to give me his hand. He did and I clasped it around the flower. Daryl's hands were warm and rough from wear, relaxed in my hold.

"Give these to her. It'll mean a lot." I persuaded him, looking into his eyes. I averted them to wander down his neck and then I kept walking.

I noted how he looked from the side view I got of him, finally really looking at him after just disregarding him as one of the survivor of the group I'd run into. I really looked at him and was impressed by what I saw.

He clearly had a great physique from how toned and muscular his arms were, clearing shown off from his cut off flannel shirt and the thickness of his chest. He was wearing worn blue jeans and work boots, muddy but strong. He had his trademark crossbow at his side, ready to attack at any sign of danger, trigger finger holding steady. His blond hair was kind of long, shaggy in some places but matted down by sweat. He had a strong jaw line, a subtle goatee, and a demeanor and attitude that I knew was the reason people naturally shied away from him. I saw it as a challenge and decided to play on.

"Cherokee roses." He mentioned out loud, swiveling his attention over to me as I averted my eyes in a quick attempt to hide my obvious staring. "Legend has it they grew from the tears of cherokee mothers while their children were being taken away from them, or disappeared."

My gaze flew back to him. "Where'd you hear that from?"

Daryl gave me a confused look that I met evenly. "Why do ya even care?"

"Why wouldn't I?" I bit back and he shut up, thinking over what I said.

He shook his head. "I read it somewhere, I dunno."

"You don't look like the type to read." I observed and laughed.

"Yeah, well, ya don' seem like the huntin' type neither."

I nodded in a 'fair enough' gesture. "I guess things change." I kept the peace.

"How'd they change for ya?" He asked me, looking genuinely curious. "I heard the lead pig interrogatin' ya, why didn' ya tell him?"

I looked at the ground. "Honestly? I guess I just wanted to stay strong. And reliving it all just weakens me in a long shot. I can't afford it half the time, so I suppress it."

"That bad, huh?"

I chewed on my lower lip. "I guess it wasn't as bad as some people had it. I didn't have to deal with anything myself."

There was an uncomfortable silence and my eyes pricked with fresh tears that I kept hidden in the dark that was falling around us. They invaded into my voice, making it tremble as I tried to keep it strong. "My parents worked at the CDC, and when things got bad they took the opportunity they offered to leave. They called me down and that's how I ended up here in Atlanta. I'm originally from Augustan.

"My mother got sick, n' my Daddy didn't want to live without her. Took care of her and then probably put a bullet through his own skull." I chocked on my rough words, meant to harden myself to the pain that was all so familiar. "I went to that high school, got the bow and arrows and the metal rod I usually use as a regular weapon. Ran into my best friend Melissa who told me she was pregnant. But there was nothing…nothing I could do." My voice was starting to break. I sniffled and tried to finish.

"The highways were fucked, everyone fighting to get out. I high tailed it out of there on a horse straight into the woods. My horse, Cruise. He's all I have left now of home." I was so close to losing control that I just set my jaw. "I was alone for around two months before I found you people."

"Liar." He finally muttered.

My head snapped up at his words and I glared at him, hurt.

"Liar." He repeated. "That's worse shit than most folks would've known. Ya didn't give up. Ya fought it all and kept strong."

I opened my mouth to speak but no words came out in relation to his statement. I pulled on my hoodie again, pulling my ponytail out to fall over my shoulder. I swallowed back my pain.

"Well… you know most of what happened to me." I stated dully after I contained the loose feelings into a locked box in my heart where I rationalized it all later at night when I was alone. "Gonna tell me about yourself?"

He did a double take and chuckled. "What's there to tell?"

"Do you or did you have anyone back home? Any family?"

"Just my asshole, shitfaced father and my racist, sexist son of a bitch brother Merle." He looked at me out of the corner of his eye. "Dad's gone, I reckon. Merle is a tough bastard. I doubt he's dead, where ever he is. Last I saw of him, he was still kickin'."

"Why isn't your brother here with you?" I murmured.

He scoffed and an angry glint came into his eyes. "Rick decided he was a threat. Probably was being one, angry prick. But whatdya think Rick did? Handcuffed 'im to a pipe on top of a roof. 'Nother guy dropped the damn key down a drain. When we came back for him-" He shook his head and looked out into the forest in disgust and anger. I could tell by his sudden silence that he was composing himself, obviously in pain. His Brother was the last thing he had left and he didn't know where he was. I knew that would be harsh. I didn't know what I'd do if I ever lost my reminder, Cruise. Reality would hit full force. "He severed his own hand, just to escape. Ya don't forget somethin' like that. Don' think anyone could kill Merle but Merle, though. I'm not worried."

The darkness was now almost completely fallen as we hit the high grass and saw the lights of the house up ahead. When I looked over at him I couldn't fully make out his expression, but I saw what I needed to see.

"Yes you are." I whispered, and he glanced at me.

"Would ya stop tryin' ta read me, woman? Gotta question, ask me. None o' these fools knows me so don't bother tryin' a ask them. I don't even know why yer so curious in the first place." He said with harsh words but they came out in a soft tone, just wondering why.

I licked my dry lips. "Neither do I. But I am, and I didn't survive this long by simply giving up on my causes."

Without another word I walked faster, avoiding Carol's eyes and going into my tent without a single word to the other survivors.

~AU: Alright so this is the last chapter I can upsate from my streak. Read and Review and hopefully this'll sate you until I find the time to post another chapter. Reviews are appreciated! Take it easy.~


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